Tuesday, October 5, 2010

The Time of the Crazymaker

The weather has not been cooperative here lately.  Rain, clouds, cold, more rain, so not to my liking.  Someone I know said something about the weather being "crispy."  Nope.  Crispy weather is hot and humid, the way I like it.  People like New York in the fall, and the winter time, but my favorite is a New York summer. You know, you can keep "Autumn in New York."  I like the way Frank Sinatra sang it, but I just don't want to think about what's coming around the corner.

So I'm having a tough week.  Annoying watercolor painting and lousy weather, a horrible combination.  To top it all off, the Crazymaker has made an appearance again.  Not gonna be fun.

When I was reading The Artist's Way course and Walking in This World, there was the mention of the Crazymaker, how to deal with him, and keep fighting resistance. Those courses helped me stay in creativity mode and to remember it's the process not the result.  But there are those that upset the proverbial apple cart, the individual who can throw you off your art path.

The Crazymaker, the Opportunist, makes your life not your own. One spends time with them and not working the creativity.  Sound familiar to anyone?  They act supportive, but it's a ruse to usurp your talent.  If you mentioned it they would balk and say "Who me?"  A whole day can be ruined while on a wild goose hunt.  The pay-off is you don't work and remember the things you wanted to create that day and didn't. They are not your good mirror.

It's been a long while and my brain has been quiet, happily so.  My time is my own. No running, long phone calls with nothing being said, or wasted time.  Time away turned into artist dates with myself.  I chose whom to spend my time with or be alone.  I breathe.  I am creative on my own terms.  Had it continued I would not be as creative as I have. I feel good. I feel strong. Privacy is a good thing.

There was a reason and they appeared.  I could ignore or give in. If I pick up again I'd be the stupid one. There is no way I'm going backwards at this point. Moving forward is the only option. When you taste freedom you just don't want to go back to jail. I'll ignore.

3 comments:

  1. *hugs* Dora. Don't envy you this dilemma :(
    Can you safely ignore?

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  2. very interesting dilemma- ignore if possible and take your paints to the beach no matter how un-summery it may be!
    Sheryl

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  3. I might have to ignore and take my licks later.

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